COUPLES THERAPY IN SANTA MONICA
Couples Therapy for the
Patterns You Keep Repeating
Couples often seek therapy when the ways they have learned to protect
themselves are now creating distance.
One partner may get loud, critical, or urgent.
The other may shut down, defend, or disappear.
Underneath the pattern, both people are often longing to feel safe, valued,
and understood.
You may recognize this
You love each other, but something feels stuck.
The same discussions keep happening without resolution.
You may become critical, urgent, or demanding, while your partner may withdraw, shut down, or become defensive.
Over time, both of you may end up feeling unseen, misunderstood, or alone, and it feels harder to connect than it used to.
Underneath these patterns is often a desire for connection, respect, and emotional safety, but you're not sure how.
You may be asking:
Why do we keep ending up here?
How can we communicate without hurting each other?
Can we rebuild trust?
How do we set boundaries that actually work?
Is there a different way to be together?
A RELATIONAL APPROACH
My work is grounded in Relational Life Therapy.
When we understand ourselves and our patterns, we can respond to each other with greater empathy, set healthy boundaries, and create more connection
and freedom in our relationship.
The goal is not to "fix" each other, but to be more relationally mindful and skillful.
Understanding the pattern
In our work together, we focus less on "who is right" and more on what is happening between you.
We will explore:
The cycle you are caught in
The role each partner plays in maintaining it
The meaning each of you makes of the other's behavior
Often, the same pattern repeats across different situations, creating a sense of being stuck.
Understanding this clearly is the first step toward change.
What we work toward
Couples therapy is not just about talking differently—it is about relating differently. Together, we work toward:
Taking responsibility without blaming or collapsing into shame
Expressing needs and feelings honestly, without attack
Listening without defensiveness or withdrawal
Repairing ruptures and rebuilding trust
Creating more emotional and physical intimacy
Developing skills that last beyond the therapy room
What sessions are like
Sessions are active and engaged.
I will help you:
Slow down difficult interactions as they happen
Identify the moves each of you is making
Practice new responses in real time
I will offer observations, feedback, and guidance—helping you see where things go off track and how to shift them.
At times, I may also offer reflections, readings, or exercises to deepen the work between sessions.
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“Our sessions with Jennifer provided us with the tools necessary to navigate adversity in our long-term relationship. Over the course of a year, our ability to identify and correct repetitive patterns and dynamics that led us into negative feedback loops improved drastically. In particular, …”
— Raheli and Ray
What clients have shared
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“We are immensely grateful for Jennifer's guidance and support as a couples therapist. We came to her when we were having difficulties communicating. She helped us to understand ourselves, each other, and the deeper issues underlying our fights with clarity and compassion. …"
— Abby and Max, NYC
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"Jennifer is an attentive listener and shares tools, knowledge, and perspectives that feel relevant and helpful. She is also very attuned to non-verbal communication and explores it with curiosity. She possesses a high level of empathy and compassion and communicates in a timely and clear manner. …”
— Noam & Penny
“You don't have to have it all figured out to begin. You just need a willingness to understand what's getting in the way and a commitment to try something new.”